Forget All The Rumors Because You Control How Words Can Affect You

Today, while I was working on some production I received an email about a comment left on one of my sites. Of course the comment came from "anonymous" and it was someone who knew me from my past.

The comment was rather harsh and very colorful. Let's just say they had very strong feelings about me. Im a strong believer that you should never apologize for your feelings. However, this situation became a great growth opportunity.

Everyone around me saw the comment, they were shocked. One of the actresses I was working with asked me how I was not letting these comments bother me.

She could not understand how I wasn't upset over the really nasty things that were expressed. I took the opportunity to share some important truths she needed to know. Now, this actress does not know me, we have only just met. I explained that anything said about you or feelings about you can only affect you if you allow them to do so.

I also, said in the line of work you are pursuing this is crucial to understand.

You see all the shows and tabloids dedicated to trashing celebrities. Why? Because we live in a society where people of stature or notoriety are public game. Many in our society are just down right not happy. They love the gossip, they want to see others in worse shape then they are. If others are torn down and ridiculed it some how makes them feel better. It's like Eleanor Roosevelt Said:

"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people."

"Do what you feel in your heart to be right- for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't."

I reminded her that yes, these comments were harsh. However, the "anonymous" author is much like society is today, sit back and don't put yourself out there because it is much safer. When you sit back it's easier to judge and damn, when you don't have to worry about putting yourself in the situation and giving your best.

I accept the fact in my line of work there will be criticism, I will make mistakes. My choices are, do I just give up? Or do I grow from mistakes and continue to make a difference.

Do I give "value" to these comments and let it affect my mindset and feel bad for myself? If I do, wouldn't I shift my attention to make someone else feel worse? No one has the right to treat anyone poorly.

I felt the need to really show the young actress something I felt would make an impact. I halted all our plans and piled everyone into my truck and drove downtown.

Downtown there was a homeless lady on the side of the road, so I stopped and we got out. I gave her all the cash I had on me. Then I asked her, "Bother way, do you care that some people think I'm a freak?" She looked at me stunned, then she said something that made a massive impact on me, she said, "No, because everyone else drive's and walks by; you saw me, and helped, Bless You!"

We piled back in the truck to head back to work. I looked over at the actress and said, "now let me ask you, If I would have got upset over someone's harsh words. If I allowed myself to be in a negative "poor me" mindset, would I have been able to move forward and make one small difference today?"

Quickly I said how this kind lady hurting and although in a bad situation was right. What she said is true, I saw her, because I "chose" to see her today.

How many times personally I have drove by never seeing anything but what was in front of me. How, many times I could stop, give just a little in order to make someone else smile.

The actress refused to take any money for the day. She said I showed her a new side of love, and couldn't wait to continue working on our new project. Because now she can make a difference.

So can words really hurt you? Yes, however, just know they are hurting you because you have given the words permission to make you feel bad. Realize the only affect anyone has over you, and your ability to have a great day is the attention you allow yourself to focus on.

The last thing I said to her before she left for the day is what I want to leave with you. "If you died tomorrow what decisions would you make today, what would matter? "

Today, I chose to not allow harsh words to affect me negatively. I used the situation and saw a homeless lady in need and helped her. I saw a a young actress allow more space in her heart for a new kind of love and compassion.

So, if I died tomorrow, does anything that people choose to feel about me matter at all? Did my choice to see the lady on the side of the road make a difference? " Because if I died tomorrow, my choice to only see good, resulted in love. My choice to only love resulted in pure love.

Next time you are mentally allowing others, or rumors, and gossip to affect you. Think how much happiness and love you are missing out on. Realize, if small minds are talking about you, raise your conscious mind and dream, dreams are love, passion, and infinite possibilities.

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