Dealing With Thwarted Intentions

Recently I asked a group of Independent Professionals if they had experienced having their intentions thwarted regarding marketing their services, I opened up a floodgate!

So let me ask you...

Have you had an intention to do some marketing activity or project in your business and been stopped cold? Dumb question, right? It's probably happened dozens of times. You set a goal. You tried something out. It didn't work. Intention thwarted.

Perhaps the most important insight I can share with you about thwarted intentions is that they are neutral; they don't mean anything in and of themselves. You try stuff and it doesn't work. Big deal. What's new? You try something else until you find a way to make it work.

If only that's how we approached thwarted intentions!

No, when an intention is thwarted, we make it mean something - usually about ourselves and frequently about someone or something else.

When you are thwarted in your marketing intentions, does it mean any of the following to you:

That you'll never be a good marketer?

That your services aren't valuable?

That people don't want what you're offering?

That you're not interesting or persuasive?

That you'll never attract enough clients?

Those are all possible assessments or interpretations that many of us buy into hook line and sinker. And to the degree that we attach to those interpretations is the degree that we act consistently with them. Do you react like this:

Feel bad, confused and frustrated?

Avoid all marketing activities?

Blame yourself or others?

Come up with "reasonable" excuses?

Make unwise long-term decisions?

All of this from a simple thwarted intention! But if we attempt to grow our business, market our services and achieve success, it's a given that our intentions will sometimes be thwarted.

Wouldn't it make sense to assign a different, more empowering interpretation to things when an intention is thwarted? The trick is, you have to do this consciously.

When you are thwarted in your marketing intentions it could actually mean the following to you:

That you're learning to be a good marketer.

That you're learning how to communicate the value.

That only some people don't want what you're offering.

That you can learn to be more persuasive.

That you'll ultimately attract enough clients.

Aren't these as true or truer than your original assessments? If you ask that question honestly, you'll see that the meaning of any thwarted intention is completely open to interpretation.

My experience is that if I look at things this way, possibilities open up instead of closing down. I feel challenged instead of defeated. I feel I've learned something instead of feeling I've lost something.

Please don't look at this only conceptually. It won't have much impact. Instead, identity a time you recently had a thwarted intention and inquire into what happened. What did you say to yourself about it? How did you react, how did you feel?

Now pick a new interpretation and try it on for size. You might actually find it fits a whole lot better than the first one!

Many of your intentions are going to be thwarted. That's life. But will you unconsciously attach a disempowering interpretation or consciously attach an empowering interpretation? It's your choice!

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