Easy Anger Management Tips

Ask yourself this question, “Do you like hanging out with people who get angry all the time or at the drop of a hat?” More importantly are you fun to hang out with when you’re angry?

The fact is that most people are extremely uncomfortable with anger. It is one of the most judged emotions that we experience. It is also one of the least understood.

There are 2 sides to anger. On one hand it can be the cause of tremendous pain and suffering. It can turn into hatred or violence in the blink of an eye and destroy everything we love and care about, or it can turn inward and become bitterness and despair. The later of course just eats us up from the inside until our body ultimately breaks down.

Neither of these scenarios are what we want in our lives. Yet, it happens all the time. Can this vicious cycle be stopped? Of course it can. How? Through understanding what anger is and how you can become it’s master, rather than it’s slave.

First of all, understand that an angry person is really saying, “I don’t feel loved and accepted”. If you can remember this simple fact the next time someone you know gets angry, you can turn it around for them instantly. All you have to do is help them to feel loved and accepted.

This might mean asking them questions to find out what’s upsetting them, or giving them space to vent their feelings, or even just listening to what they are saying and not giving an opinion unless it’s asked for.

As you could imagine, this is far easier to do for others than it is for yourself. Once anger is triggered rational thinking can quickly get lost amongst a flood of emotions and thoughts that seem to belong more to a crazy person than you.

This is when many people say and do things they later regret. The secret to preventing this reactive behaviour is to break the habit.

Here are 3 steps that will help you create a new habit that will help you to remain calm and stay in control of what you say and do.

1. Acknowledge what you are feeling.

Powerful emotions such as anger need to be released. The more you bottle it up, the more dangerous it becomes. By letting the other person know that you feel upset, frustrated or angry without blaming them for your feeling is an action of self love.
It takes courage to be honest about how you feel, especially if you know others may judge you for it. The fact is that at the end of the day what really matters is how you feel about yourself.

2. Take several, slow, deep breaths.

Once you have shared how you feel take a few moments to regain your centre. If need be give yourself some time and space from the other person to take several slow, deep breaths before resuming any communication. The purpose of this step is to allow your anger to be released through your breath and to get clarity about what you need to say or do to resolve any conflict.

3. Choose your response

Once you have calmed down or centred yourself then choose how you want to respond to the situation. As long as you are in control of what you say and do, you break the old habit of action-reaction from the past.

The more times you do this the easier it gets. The benefits of applying this simple technique for managing anger include less stress, improved health, happier and more productive relationships, improved confidence and self esteem, just to name a few.

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