Grasping Never Grabs Anything

The irony in life is that the harder we grasp at things, the less we actually get and hold in our hands. The more we grasp for control, power, or to keep something, the further it actually gets from us and the harder it is to keep, and the more sorrow and misery we feel because of it.

Imagine for a moment that you have a coin in your hand. If you grasp the coin with a closed fist, you limit your ability to see the coin, to use the coin. You are holding onto the coin and grabbing at it hoping not to lose it.

If however you are holding the coin in the palm of your hand with your palm facing up and your hand open, you get to see and experience the coin without grasping. You allow the coin to simply be as you hold it and enjoy it without the need to grasp and cling to it.

This is how we must approach everything in our lives. The harder we try to cling to something, the harder it becomes to hold on. We wear ourselves our, we get ourselves upset and disturbed because it always seems to push that thing away.

The more control we try to get in our lives, in any area of our life, the less control we seem to end up having. It's a strange irony about life. The moment we give up control, we gain complete control and freedom over that very thing we gave up the desire and need to have control over.

We can see this in relationships all the time by simply looking around. Someone finds someone else that they want to be with and they chase that person with all their might. They call them all the time and try to be near them and with them as often as possible.

Before long, that person wants nothing to do with them. We have also seen people who barely called or talked to someone, and that other someone falls head over heals for them. It's as though the harder someone chases, the more the other person runs away. The harder someone is to get, the more the other person wants them.

We also see this while in relationships. Someone gets insecure and scared of losing the other person. These fears and insecurities cause the other person to drift away and start losing interest in the person with the insecurities and fears. The fear of losing that person actually attracts and creates the same reality that we are trying to avoid and keep from happening.

We must learn to experience and enjoy things without grasping or clinging to them. Death is a big sorrow for people when they lose someone they love because they grasp and cling to that person. If instead we could all learn to love while the person is there, but let go as they leave, we would find a place of peace and joy that we never knew existed.

This is not to say that grieving for the loss of a loved one is bad. It is saying that we must enjoy them while they are in our lives, and be willing to let go of them and enjoy the memories when they are going or gone. The same is true for everything else in our lives.

We will get upset when someone scratches our car or breaks something of ours. Of course people should always treat other people's things with respect and dignity, however, everything changes and ages and wears out eventually.

It's impossible to have a car without it getting dirty or eventually getting dents and or scratches in it. Everything, including the computer you are using right now will eventually wear out and need replaced. Even if you park it in a closet some place and never use it or touch it, the natural order of things will cause it to eventually fall apart.

Learn to open up and let go. Avoid grasping and clinging to things in your life. This includes people, material objects, emotions, ideas, concepts, and perceptions. Let things be as they are, enjoy them and experience them when they are, and let them carry on about their lives as the natural order of the universe states.

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