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Author: Alison Sardelli | Total views: 30 Comments: 0
Word Count: 1207 Date: Wed, 18 Feb 2009 2:09 PM

Finding the Romance in Your Life

Many people assume that the romance in a person's life only fades if that person has settled down with another and life has become routine, however this is not always the case. While it remains true that for couples who have been together for a number of years the romance may at times be stretched a little thin, there are many singles who suffer from just such an absence.

What is romance? Many different ideas can be considered romantic and while there remain several that spark immediate recognition in our society, others may only be considered such by a select few. Such obvious icons as flowers, candy and jewelry are quite commonly amongst the most well known, but for some a particular plastic token may prove to be the most romantic symbol in the world.

Though not exclusively defined by an experience a great deal of what people consider romance to be is shaped by their relationships. An unexpected moment in which nothing particularly romantic was taking place can end up being the most romantic experience of a person's life. On the other hand, the ideal set up of a romantic dinner, flowers, wine and music can sometimes fall flat and end up being a terribly boring event. It is not surprising to find that when asked, most people describe their most romantic moments as having to do with something very personal and perhaps unique to their situation.

For those that find that even after a series of dates the romance seems to be lacking in their life it may be important to take a look at how you define romance. Perhaps you have been watching for the wrong kind of traits in others, making assumptions based on a general idea of romance rather than your own. It may also be that you haven't yet discovered what you find to be particularly romantic and you may need to bring out that adventurous spirit within to explore the possibilities.

Many people experience some difficulty with romance in today's society because of the changing symbols of what define men and women. While it is fairly common that some men may experience difficulty when trying today act in a romantic way, today we find that there are women who feel equally as embarrassed. Because the general idea that romance is more of a female desire than a male one has become common it can be confusing as to why certain women shy away from it, but the solution in this case may be more easily accomplished than defining the problem: if you want romance, don't worry about what others may think, this is between you and your sweetheart.

Allowing the general perception of others to influence your heart will not only often lead to disappointment, but in many cases will fail completely. You may be able to pretend you don't seek romance, but the pretense will not make you happy.

Though there may be many definitions of romance there are certainly some very common components which may help or hurt the flow in your life. Many romantic stories often include a great deal of drama and suspense which help to create an intensity that is coupled with a feeling of desire. These feelings often diminish overtime and are the common cause of romantic situations becoming less frequent.

A very basic and common example of fleeting romance: Waiting for that phone call from a new love interest can be very difficult and can make a man, or a women experience intense feelings. When the phone call comes, many people experience a rush, combined with relief. This confirmation that the person on the other end wants to speak with them is comforting and exciting. In later years, after hundreds, if not thousands of phone calls have been made; they are not often treated with the same enthusiasm.

Why is this? Because they have become comfortable not just with each other, but with the safety of knowing that the phone call will come. Without doubt, there is no suspense and without suspense, drama may disappear, though most people hope to end up in relationships which this is absent it can also hurt the appearance of romance.

After discussing some of the reasons for which a person of any relationship status may be experiencing a lack of romance in their life, you may be well on your way to creating solutions. It is possible to reflect on what brought romance into your life in the past and find some very creative ideas that may help to bring it back; however if you find that understanding the problem does not present you with h any workable solutions a few basic tips may be handy:

Couples:

Make use of romantic language when appropriate; phrases like "my true love" or "my darling" can seem a little silly when in a normal situation, but when the mood calls for it they can be very endearing to hear.

Surprise your sweetheart with a passionate night together or an outing that is not only romantic, but perhaps nostalgic. Break the everyday routine and add a little mystery to the event by whisking your partner away to a surprise location.

Remind the object of your affection of your devotion by letting them know what special qualities make them the only one for you.

Announce your love to the world by sending flowers, gifts or sharing a sexy (but legal) public display of affection; this can help to heat things up between you.

Change the scene by getting away together without family or business and explore a new location together, this may help to rekindle some forgotten, youthful personality traits.

Singles:

Take a chance on an unusual candidate by allowing yourself a little adventure; never neglect your safety to achieve a little spice in your romantic life, remember that you can try new things without having to go overboard.

Be bold when heading out with friends on the dating scene; while not overstepping the bounds of expected social behavior a more confident and aggressive attitude may help you to feel more passionate about your dating life.

Try a new way of dating by making use of the technologies and programs of our time. Flirting with a stranger may be just the thing to get you in a more passionate mood; try making use of online dating sites where anonymity allows you to freely express your romantic, passionate feelings without getting involved in a serious relationship.

However you choose to ignite those flames of passion that allow romance to sweep through your daily grind, be true to your own nature and don't be afraid to let your adventures side come out and play. Remember that most people experience a period (or several,) of time in their lives when romance seems just out of reach. Romantic situations may not be a part of what makes up each day, however with a little effort you too can experience this kind of passion again.