Get Your Ex Back After A Break Up

A lot of people loose out on relationships by doing the wrong things after a breakup--even when the relationship can still be salvaged! Here are a few dos and don'ts that will help keep you sane--and help get your ex back.

Don't sit around feeling sorry for yourself. Nothing is less attractive than a person who sits around feeling sorry for themselves.

And it's not just when you sit around, that you'll seem unattractive. It'll affect your demeanor throughout the day. It will show in everything you do, everything you say, and in how you hold yourself.

Not to mention, it'll just make you feel like crap!

Do think about what your ex said about why he or she broke up with you. This is one of the hardest things to genuinely do after a breakup. It's also one of the most important.

You've probably heard the saying, "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got." This applies to relationships as it does anything else. As much as it may pain your ego to do so, really give some thought to what your ex said to your during your break up. What they said likely holds the clues you need to getting back together!

Don't accuse your ex or try and put them on a guilt trip. Remember what we said about nothing being less attractive than a person who sits around feeling sorry for themselves. There is one exception to that rule: a person who sits around feeling sorry for themselves, who is blaming YOU for it!

You won't likely get far with your ex by making them feel bad about themselves. Telling them how wrong they are won't do much better. So stop with the guilt trips already.

Do try and understand their point of view. Your ex didn't just wake up one day and say, "I think I'll break up with my mate today." (And if they did...you're probably better off without them!) They had to have some kind of reason for breaking up with you.

If you really want to get your ex back, you need to understand why they aren't with you anymore. They may have told you as much, when they broke up with you.

Then again, they may not have. It wouldn't hurt to put yourself in their shoes--not just about why they might have broken up with you, but about how they may be feeling right now.

There are also a few--but not many--good books on the subject of why people leave relationships, that might help you understand why your ex left--and what might break bring them back.

Don't try and play the sympathy card. For one thing, it probably won't work. And if it does? Getting someone to feel sorry for you is about as effective as sitting around feeling sorry for yourself. This is just not going to help you mend your relationship!

Do show him or her that you are strong and can make it on your own. If moping around makes you seem unattractive, you can bet that keeping your chin up makes you look good!

Some people might worry that looking happy after a breakup will send the wrong message to their ex. But if you think your ex won't want you unless you're sad...well, you probably don't need to be with that person anyway!

People are nearly always attracted to other people who are strong, confident, and enjoying their lives. This goes for men and women of all genders, persuasions, and orientations. Nobody expects you to sing and do a dance of joy after you've been dumped...but if you show that your are strong and can make it just fine on your own, thank-you-very-much, you might just give your ex some second thoughts!

A full guide on how to get your ex back is beyond the scope of this article. But I can guarantee that following this advice will help you stay sane and remain attractive after a breakup!

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