Gadget Reviews Are A Clue To Santa's Alter Ego

Ah, I can almost smell the mince pies now. Yes, the season of good will is fast approaching, and whether we like it or not, it is time to spend spend spend! This time of year brings with it a few nuggets of beauty that slip seamlessly together; men, beards and gadget reviews that are full of silver man-gifts.

I'm not sure why it is that gifts for men have to be silver, I must remember to ask Santa next time I see him, but it does seem that it is possible to pick any ordinary item in the world, smother it in a brushed steel finish, et voila! It's a gadget that every man never knew he wanted, and now can't live without.

Given the time of year, and the nature of my occupation (professional shopaholic - BA Hons), I have been inevitably trawling those gift magazines that come with Sunday supplements for the perfect prezzie to pop in a stocking (besides my gorgeous legs of course!). It has been during this annual activity that is so spectacularly specific top the species Homo sapiens that I had my not so epic epiphany.

The commercial incarnation of Christmas was made for beard trimmers. It all makes perfect sense, and here I shall put forward my watertight argument; in the style of Ally McBeal. Or maybe not. Firstly, it seems to me that a large proportion of the aforementioned man gifts that are of bond-esque silver gadgety beauty are designed to keep various forms of facial hair growth in check. Secondly, that familiar and friendly face of Christmas, Santa Clause is one seriously hairy guy.

As far as subliminal advertising goes, I know it exists, but the unity of beard trimmers and the hirsute public face of Christmas is too much of a coincidence. In fact, it is the utter obviousness of this marketing genius that has allowed the whole shebang to go undetected for a number of years. Maybe Mr Clause is in fact that Remington guy, or in deed Mr Philips, even Mr Wilkinson. Maybe he is an undercover Christmas sales agent called Remington Wilkinson-Philips and he is duty bound to shear every last hair from the face of every last man, under the cover of his own visual cacophony of facial hair.

Maybe I have become a little over exited, but my near as leak-proof point has been more or less made; it's all about silver grooming kits, not as some think, Coca Cola. Among the treats this year are the ever more advanced shavers and trimmers from Remington Wilkinson-Philips. The gadget reviews of the latest instalments promise an attachment for every style. The Remington PG400 for example, boasts six precision attachments for creating a goatee of any shape, a docking station and three types of silver-look coatings - nanosilver (that's a new one for me), titanium and a plastic tray that apparently looks like it's made from metal.

The Quattro Titanium Precision from Wilkinson Sword, manages to slip it's metalness into it's title, thus making it a viable man-gift this season. It is essentially a normal razor that has a conveniently placed, battery powered beard trimmer attachment, and seems like a no-frills solution to fashioning the face hair. Finally, Philips has released the TT2021. I have decided that this is the ultimate stocking filler for Christmas. Not only is it a one stage metal effect groomer (chrome) but with TT in the title, it is strutting a manly aura before the trimming even begins. The snowman on the icing has to be the fact that the Philips is an all-over body groomer, which means no matter where Santa is sprouting hairs, he'll be a smooth as a Victoria plum by New Year.

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